Cut to the Chase – chapter in dissolving sadness copyright A R Research 2025

I won’t circle around the truth. At my lowest, exhaustion weighed on me like a heavy blanket. Each day felt like a battle just to get out of bed, and hope seemed distant. The fight of my life wasn’t won by a miracle or a sudden revelation—it was a slow, stubborn realization that everything I needed was already unlocked, inside me as I nourished this newly found ability. 

But the most profound moment came when I understood this: the same strength, the same wisdom, the same spark that helped me rise exists in everyone. The key is within you, It’s not reserved for the lucky or the chosen—it’s universal, quietly waiting to be discovered.

I remember sitting alone, replaying the events that brought me here: the setbacks, the loneliness, the moments when sadness felt endless. Yet, in that quiet, I also remembered a time when I achieved something remarkable—receiving high school recognition for gaining the highest examination score not once, but twice in my final year. That memory reminded me that resilience and determination had always been a part of me.

I stopped searching for answers in distant places and listened to the wisdom that had always been there, buried beneath doubt and fear. I found a higher power—not in the sky, but in the courage to trust myself and take one more step forward. That was the turning point.

One could say... I became my own catalyst for change, drawing strength from the scars and stories that shaped me—and realizing that everyone carries this same potential within. Look within for the light of intelligence.

Something I was holding back was the words "Well what do you want to do" that came to me from somewhere over the universe and rang in my mind as I worked my 12-step program.

I recall seeking knowledge of Gods will for me? This knowledge, needed to progress to the next step, was a block for me, but I was not willing to back down on the woo.

Later in Prayer and meditation, little did I know, I was building a deeper understanding with the power greater than myself. Acting out in my mind, I ask "What is this powers will for me" It seemed to be saying "Don't ask me... I trust you with your will" OK, this means I am the master of my own destiny, to give and live as I judge others actions as aligning with the higher thought values, or not.